Today I realized that the physical comedy used in movies and TV shows is not nearly as funny when it's happening to you in real life. So next time you laugh at a prat fall or a giant mess on TV, remember how terrible it would be if it happened to you.
(Wouldn't it be weird if I didn't have an example story to share right now?)
So I was getting ready to fix my lunch today at work. And I have a can of soup. So I started to pour it into my Styrofoam bowl when I realized the bowl was too small for the amount of soup. So I picked up the half-full bowl and attempted to pour the soup back into the can. In the process, I broke the flimsy bowl, spilled soup all over the counter and floor, and nearly died by slipping on the soup puddle at my feet. So I mopped up what I could, soaked to the forearms with soup shrapnel (celery, tomatoes, etc.).
Naturally, this is when the previously empty kitchen filled with people waiting to use the microwave next to me. So they got to see the rest of the ordeal, wondering how in the world I managed to spill soup when the only things involved were a bowl and a can. So I scooped, scraped, and mopped up the spill and went on my way.
And if this had been on Friends back in the 90s or on 30Rock this year, I would laugh at whoever was acting it out. But in real life, it's not all that funny. It's quite embarrassing. Especially embarrassing if you keep mumbling "broken bowl" and "didn't know my own strength" between bursts of your own nervous laughter while people watch you slide around the area in vegetable-flavored puddles.
The good news is that I got to eat McDonald's for lunch today. The bad news is that the only reason I got McDonald's is because I'm underqualified to microwave a bowl of soup.