A Very Special "My Older Brothers"

I always wish I had better reasons for staying up too late. But I've found that the older I get, the less cool the reason to stay up past my bed time. When we were growing up, my older brother and I would stay up as late as we could on Friday nights playing Mariokart on Super Nintendo. It was really fun and is still the best reason I've ever had to stay up late. My mom only let us sleep in on Saturdays, so that was our one night to really go for it. Then came college, where I would stay up to play more advanced video games, or to study for an exam, or write a paper. I remember writing a 20-page research paper in one night and getting an "A" on it. Yeah, I was that guy.

But nowadays, I stay up for such stupid reasons. I found myself recently staying up reading a book. For fun. On a Tuesday. What has happened to me? That's not fun or necessary. And then when people ask me the next day why I'm so tired, what am I supposed to say? "Yeah, I got to a really good part of my book and couldn't put it down!" I feel like such a nerd. I might as well say, "Yeah, I got to a particularly hard Dragoncube and had to power up my talisman before entering the Temple of Forbidden Wisdom. That's when I realized I was fresh out of damage crystals and Mountain Dew!" At least in school people assumed you were studying or doing homework. And you're expected to stay up late in college. But now, I kinda need a good excuse the next day for being so tired. And reading a book doesn't really cut it.

I told my older brother about this and he (predictably) gave me some suggestions. And for some reason, his suggestions always include some form of lying. So he said I should start making up excuses for why I'm so tired. He recommended telling people I have a dermatological condition that prevents me from doing any outside activities during the daytime (which is actually pretty believable if you see how pale I am). So I should tell people that I spent a few hours mowing my lawn, weeding my flowerbed, and watering my plants. He also suggested I admit to people that I have an addiction to caffeine pills and then sob in their arms ("I'm so excited! I'm so excited. I'm so... scared!") a la Jessie Spano. That might be fun to try.