Humor Attempt... Rejected

I like to think I have a way with words. If I have time to prepare, I can usually write my way out of a jam.  That's why I have an English degree. That's why I blog. And it's one of the few things I feel like I'm good at. I mean, you should see the emails I send at work. They are so concise and professional! But in one area, I'm stumped. I can't seem to find the balance I need between tact and humor. I just don't know how to respond when a family member ruins a funny Facebook status.

I only use Facebook to be funny. And on the rare occasion that I use it to brag about my kids, I usually throw in a little humor so it doesn't get annoying. Because I'm very much bothered by the people who use Facebook to declare their children the cutest, smartest, or most interesting children to ever exist. And I'm equally bothered by those who use it as a medium for their political philosophy. To be clear, I don't mind a moderate amount of bragging or political talk. But the people who provide a constant feed of everything that crosses their minds are the ones that I don't like.

Anyway, that's why I try to be funny and not much else. I don't like to annoy people. So most of the things I post are little one-liners or anecdotes (often completely fabricated) just to make people laugh. And I'd say at least 65% of the time, one of my older relatives doesn't get the joke or uses my status as a time to reaffirm their affection for me. I don't get "LOL" or even "haha." I get "Good to see you guys this weekend" or "You know, you could just go to bed at a reasonable time. Love ya." And try as I might, I have no response to them.  I can't figure out what to say. Because I can't be rude and put "smh, never mind." And I can't explain the joke because then I'm condescending and ruining my own joke. So I usually just don't respond.

So is there any advice out there? How do I stay funny, avoid rudeness, and still explain the humor to a relative? Is there even a way to do that? I'm starting to think it's impossible.