Thursday, August 13, 2009

Top Ten Other Things My Older Brother Learned Recently

10. If the new car smell was a food, people would be fat just on that.

9. A tuxedo t-shirt does not count as "formal wear."

8. Apparently, there is a wrong way to eat a Reese's.

7. It's insensitive to say, "Can't you just reschedule your chemo?"

6. Comparing a girl's hairstyle to a wet bird is not an effective pickup line.

5. People don't think you're hardcore because you drink straight tap water without ice.

4. You shouldn't mock children if their parents are present.

3. If you notice a bunch of people pointing their camera phones at you, stop whatever you're doing and just walk away.

2. The blind guy may not see you making funny faces at him, but the other people on the bus will get mad.

1. Peanut butter only works as "glue" for crackers, not for household repairs.

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