The Best Laid Plans Of Moms And Men

My children never cease to amaze me. From the good ("I didn't know you could juggle!") to the bad ("Why are there movies in the fridge and yogurt in the TV console?"). But one of the good things that I've been amazed by is their capacity for remembering things. It's been one of those unforeseen perks of parenthood to find out that if I mention something once, my son will remember it forever. And since I'm not a liar or someone who uses foul language, I don't have to worry that he'll embarrass me. So it really is a perk.

Well, we bought some Christmas gifts really early last year because we found them on clearance. We picked up a sit-and-spin thing and an Astros chair for Andrew. And he was with us. He even expressed his excitement about the toys. But we figured he'd forget about the stuff before the holidays came around. We figured wrong.

My son didn't mention the stuff for months. And we wrapped the gifts and put them in the closet (of course when I say "we" I obviously mean "my ridiculously-organized wife"). Then when December came around, we started talking to Andrew about Christmas. We told him that he was going to get presents like he did on his birthday. And I'm not joking when I tell you that he said, "Can I get the spin thing and the baseball chair now?" It was like getting slapped in the face. I don't even remember what we said to him. Part of me was shocked and disappointed that he knew what he was getting. But another part of me was really impressed that he remembered something from that long ago.

But the more I think about it, the more I think he knew what he was doing. He probably plotted for months so he could ruin our little scheme. He must have figured that if he kept talking about it over and over again, we might return the toys for other stuff just to throw him off. So he waited until the 90-day return policy period was over and until December was upon us and it was a little too late to get new gifts. And then he told us. It was like someone knowing about their surprise party after weeks of secretive planning. So I guess this year we'll have to get a babysitter when it's time to shop for the kids' gifts.