Thursday, April 15, 2010

Idle Hans

There's a guy I work with whose name is Hans (it's okay, because he's Dutch). And I don't know him very well, but I know he's kind of a jerk. I made an honest mistake one time and opened his office door before he said "Come in," and he flipped out on me and started telling me how rude I was and that "the door was closed for a reason." It was mean because it was my first week, and I didn't know the rules about office door opening. So I put him on my list (of people to kill avoid). And I'm not one to mistreat people, even if they're jerks. So I've never been discourteous or messed with him or anything like that. But I've gotten back at him in two ways.

First, I purposely mispronounce his last name. I don't do it to his face, and I've only said it to others a couple of times, but it's more about how I mispronounce it. Because his last name is Hoogerbrugge. (And no, that's not made up. That's really his name.) And I don't like to brag, but I'm pretty good at figuring out anagrams for things. The reason I don't like to brag about that is because I think I might have a touch of dyslexia. But it's only enough dyslexia to make me a slow reader, a great Scrabble player, and a pretty decent anagram finder. It's not really a super-power. It's more like a mediocre-power. At any rate, I noticed that an anagram for Hoogerbrugge is Booger Hugger. And that made me imagine him as someone who hugged giant boogers. So now, every time I see him, I think about him hugging giant boogers. And that makes me feel better about him being a tool.

And the second thing I did to get back at him was post this to my blog. Now people know that Hans Hoogerbrugge is kind of a jerk. And a total Booger Hugger.

2 comments:

Landry said...

Are booger-huggers and tree-huggers similar? Do booger-huggers protest outside of factories where those blue nose pumps for babies chanting, "Don't take our boogers away! Or we'll be really sad and miss them alot!" (I'm assuming booger-huggers are not very intelligent and can't rhyme.) I want to see a documentary on booger-huggers. Make this happen.

-lisa- said...

Well my oldest son is named Hans and he's not a jerk...but with a name like booger hugger he might become one.