A few years ago I bought two suits. They were on sale as buy one, get one free promotion. So I decided to get one of them that fit me at the time and buy the other intentionally smaller because I planned on losing weight. And as it turned out, that was a brilliant plan. I started out with one suit that fit and one that was too small. Then I lost a good amount of weight. Now I have one suit that fits and one that's too big. And that's a good feeling. Of course when I say I have one suit that "fits" I don't mean it fits perfectly. It's still a little snug.
Well, my sister is getting married this weekend. And my plan a few weeks ago was to lose enough weight to be comfortable in my smaller suit. And as it turned out, that was a very stupid plan. I can wear the suit now, but it's a little too slimming. In other words, I have to suck in and hold my breath when I button it. And that's not very comfortable.
So I was explaining this to my wife last night and she panicked a little bit. She said it wasn't going to work and we should have thought of this a month ago, and this is really not good, etc. But I decided that I can lose enough of my girth to get it to fit in the next two days. And she thinks I'm crazy. So I bet her $100 that it would fit much better by tomorrow night. She didn't take the bet (unfortunately), but I'll still feel vindicated when I'm wearing the suit at the wedding and it looks better than it did last night. That'll show her. So where can I get a manly girdle in the next 36 hours?