I'm glad my company doesn't have a CSI department. Because they would totally have a donut powder residue kit, and I'd totally be busted.
I burned my tongue on the first sip of coffee. Now every subsequent sip tastes like what I think molten asphalt would taste like.
The guy who sits across from me using a particular cologne that doesn't really match his natural smell (or "body chemistry" as I've heard it called). The result is that he smells kinda like gasoline.
When I say "I'm awesome," my son is now trained to say, "No you're not dude, don't lie." And it's okay, because he has no idea what he's saying.
I say the phrase "I'm awesome" way too much.